Re-Evaluating the Friendzone

Today, as I was flitting about, I found this comic, courtesy of MamaMantis. It lays out, in a humorous but honest manner,  problems with the nice guy complex and the friend zone.

And I love it. I love it because: I never owed anyone a date for being nice to me. I don’t assume that every friendship is based on an original desire to be more-than-friends, and I shouldn’t have to.

Being a gentleman is a turn on. In fact, one of the things that I find attractive about Sam, and have since the night I met him, is that he’s a gentleman. But taking care of someone when they need it, and not raping them when they’re inebriated–those things are what people who aren’t criminals do. Not raping someone doesn’t make you a gentleman-it just means you’re not a criminal.

It’s time to re-evaluate concepts of what it means to be a friend-of what friendships between men and women mean.



Leave a Comment

  1. I always thought the friend zone was just when one or both parties didn’t want to date for fear of ruining the friendship. I can’t tell if I’ve been using it wrong or if it’s changed meanings in the past few years.


    1. Friend zone is a little more specific than that. One party wants to date, while the other doesn’t. It often gets thrown around in conversations about men and women’s friendship, and many men complain about being “friend-zoned” by a woman they’re interested in if she just wants to be friends rather than dating.


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